Tuesday, February 3, 2004

But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, saying, "It is a ghost!" And they cried out in fear. But immediately Jesus spoke to them and said, "Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid."
(Matthew 14.26-27 NRSV)

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While serving aboard a gunboat in Vietnam, Dave Roever was holding a phosphorus grenade some six inches from his face when a sniper's bullet ignited the explosive. In his book, WELCOME HOME, DAVEY, he describes the first time he saw his face after the explosion: "When I looked in that mirror, I saw a monster, not a human being . . . My soul seemed to shrivel up and collapse in on itself, to be sucked into a black hole of despair. I was left with an indescribable and terrifying emptiness. I was alone in the way the souls in hell must feel alone." Finally Roever came back to the States to meet with his young bride, Brenda. Just before Brenda arrived, Roever watched the wife of another burn victim tell her husband that she wanted a divorce. Then Brenda walked in.

"Showing not the slightest tremor of horror or shock," Roever writes, "she bent down and kissed me on what was left of my face. Then she looked me in my good eye, smiled, and said, Welcome home, Davey! I love you.' To understand what that meant to me you have to know that's what she called me when we were most intimate; she would whisper Davey,' over and over in my ear . . . By using her term of endearment for me, she said, You are my husband. You will always be my husband. You are still my man."

To understand the grace of God poured out in Jesus Christ, we must first understand our inadequacy, our imperfection, our ugliness, as it were. But Jesus Christ in all his loveliness, in all his holiness, in all his glory still loves us. There was no need to be terrified.

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God of peace, bring peace and love to my soul, as I worship you. Amen.

Ron Newhouse

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